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Month: June 2015

There’s Always a Little Rex in Indominus (Jurassic World Review)

Dinosaurs are still cool but not as surprising as the first time around. The technology definitely has improved over the years but the story remains the same (close to the first 2 movies). There are a few references to the first 2 movies but you don’t really have to see any of the other movies to know what’s going on. This movie feels more like a remake of the first film instead of an actual sequel.

The movie starts off with a pair of brothers go on a trip to the rebuilt Jurassic Park (now World) to spend time with their aunt who happens to run the park. The story in the film is told from the perspective of the two brothers, the aunt just trying to hold everything together (which I will get to later), and the hunk dinosaur trainer guy. It’s been 22 years since the first film and now that infamous island has a new park on it. The first glimpse of the new park involves a bright and vibrant opening that reminds the viewer of the first time they saw the original Jurassic Park, with a voice over by the late Richard Attenborough in introducing the park visitors and the audience of the wonders of the first dinosaur amusement park. Sort of a tribute to what the first movie was about and the realization of it coming true.

Problems soon arise when, due to dwindling park attendance numbers, the park begins to start splicing the DNA  of their animals in order to create a new attraction. Surprisingly enough, they manage to create a bigger, more aggressive, smarter dinosaur, the Indominus Rex. Being the type of film it is, this dinosaur finds a way to reap havoc within the park and cause problems for the film’s protagonists. The film tries to act as a social commentary about the ethics and morality involved with cloning animals and whether or not they should be considered property or to be treated as living objects. The movie does not beat us over the head with this as most of the movie plays out as a creature movie where the stars of the film must merely try to survive the Indominus Rex and avoid the destruction in its wake. The movie when compared to the first 2 is not as scary or suspenseful because the new dinosaur they have created for this film is simply not as scary and the way it is was depicted does not inspire suspense. While watching the film, I never felt a sense of danger as the stars never acted like they were in danger. Knowing what I do about the first 3 films, the story was rather predictable and did not innovate or further the series at all. This isn’t the best movie I have ever seen but I was entertained. The performances of Chris Pratt and Bryce Dallas Howard kept me interested (albeit a little cliche). Some of the “family problem” stuff, I could have definitely gone without and the film kind of took a little time to get going. Fans of the series will not be disappointed with this installment and for those who have not seen a film in this series will be entertained as well.

Score: 7.5/10

If you liked this, please read my other reviews here.

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Now You See Me

Not a bad start after roughly 3 weeks but I think we can do better:

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I don’t have too much else to say today but if you ever wondered what I looked like, here you go:

alone

This was a few years ago before me and a few of my friends went to see This is the End. I thought it was a pretty funny movie. I also saw World War Z earlier that day. It was a mediocre and disappointing movie. I am not a fan of PG-13 horror movies due to the lack of blood and gore. I personally think that when watching a zombie movie (or anything zombie related), I want to see zombies get obliterated or see zombies tear people apart. In this movie, zombie attacks were way too clean and all of the zombie kills were off screen or from far away. The funniest part of the movie has to be the gratuitous Pepsi product placement scene:

This week will be busy for me because I should have reviews for Jurassic World, Magic Mike XXL, and Terminator Genesis and the continuation of my Fallout 3 playthrough. I will end by taking a moment to wish all of my Canadian friends a happy Canada Day and a happy 4th of July to my American friends.

The Nightmare Never Ends (Where Nightmares are Made Part 2)

This is a second part to something I posted earlier.

Nightmares come in all shapes and sizes. Earlier I mentioned a song worthy of being played on a loop in hell. If I were to add another song that is just as worthy, it would be this one:

It is corny, it is cheesy, it is just plain old bad. If I were to read a Harlequin romance novel (not that I have), I would imagine this song playing in my head. I also question the choice to have this song in a loop in a grocery store. No one wants to be reminded of how alone they are while they are shopping for themselves. Those who are forced to listen to it (such as myself), want to stick pens in their ears until they start to bleed.

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Continue reading “The Nightmare Never Ends (Where Nightmares are Made Part 2)”

Italy Would be Proud

What would any other reasonable person had done? It was a Saturday night after work and I was hungry. Being the progressive thinker I am, I decided to try to find a way to get something before I get home from the bus. Luckily like most people in the first world, I happen to own a smartphone. I chose to use it for good and not evil. I remembered that I once ordered some Pizza Hut from their mobile site and it was delicious so I wanted to do it again. While browsing the site today, I came across a promotion involving the stuffing of crusts with 5 cheeses for the very low price of $2 for a medium size pizza.

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Thunder Buddies For Life (Ted 2 Review)

That foul-mouthed, drug abusing teddy bear that we loved from the first movie is back for more. The film picks up 6 months after the first film with Ted and his best friend John still friends before Ted is about to get married and John is feeling down after having been in a divorce. Once married, it isn’t what he imagined. With his relationship in trouble, his solution is to have a baby. Little did he know that the government would soon recognize how he’s been living his life as a person. When his personhood comes into question, he now has to fight to maintain his marriage and for his own civil rights. Ted, John, and new for this film, a young female lawyer Samantha L. Jackson (obvious joke alert) must sue the state of Massachusetts in order for Ted to be recognized as a person while Ted tries to find someone for John.

If you’ve seen the first film, you won’t be surprised by this one. You’ll get all the dirty, homophobic humor that was in the first Ted or from any episode of Family Guy. This film still seems to have the charm that the first one had. I also enjoyed the opening musical sequence of the movie as well. Some may not be a fan of the humor in this film as it could easily be considered offensive. I don’t know what that says about me but I liked it. I wasn’t a fan of Seth MacFarlane’s earlier film “A Million Ways to Die in the West” but this one has the right amount of stupid but doesn’t take it too far.

Sure there aren’t as many jokes in this as the first film so they chose to take what they had and stretched it over the film’s running time at almost 2 hours (which could have been shorter).  The film occasionally suffers from an identity crisis, it wavers between a social commentary about one’s civil rights and an extended Family Guy episode but doesn’t do enough of either. I did like what I saw but I just wished that there was more of it. I believe it could definitely have gone without a few minor plot lines for I believe that they took away from the main story and added to the unnecessary length. I won’t mention the few cameos in the film other than that there is one noteworthy one that you will definitely not expect but will definitely remember. Overall, it’s not a bad film but I thought it could have done more. I liked this one just as much as the first film but not more. If you are looking for a comedy, I would recommend Spy with Melissa McCarthy. It happens to be my favorite comedy of the year and also one of the best overall movies.

Score: 7/10

If you liked this, please read my other reviews here.

Fallout 3 Playthrough Part 1

I was feeling nostalgic today so I decided to start a new game in Fallout 3. First I had dinner (I am just going to be pretentious and post a picture of my food).

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The start of the game was exactly how I remembered. That song, “I don’t want to set the world on fire” started playing and I started getting chills. I don’t know what it is about that song that gets me so excited. Maybe it was when I heard it for the first time when I saw a commercial for the game before it initially came out and thought how perfectly it suited the game.

The tutorial/vault sequence was fun. My character was being born. Funny how the doctor didn’t know whether I was a boy or girl, I think he should have learnt this at medical school. I chose my race which was black because I felt like being opressed. My face, my hair and other features where just presets because I wasn’t feeling too creative at the time. It was interesting because I never played as a black character before. Also for choosing a black character, the father character becomes black as well.

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What made this extra special was that since the character is voiced by Liam Neeson, that makes Liam Neeson black. His voice does not match his character (I assume you know what Liam Neeson’s voice sounds like). So I started off as a black baby crawling to my father. I then had my 10th birthday party where I got my pip-boy which was awesome, I got a sweetroll from Old Lady Palmer, and then spit on it before giving it to Butch (the asshole bully living in the same vault as me). My dad and Jonas gave me a BB gun which I used to shoot targets and radroaches which wasn’t too difficult. I turned 16 and had to take my G.O.A.T (Generalized Occupational Aptitude Test) so I can get my work assignment but before that I had to defend Amata, the vault overseer’s daughter, from Butch and his new gang called the Tunnel Snakes (douches). I started fist-fighting them and then they quickly just gave up and left. After that I entered the classroom to take the test. This is how I did it:

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I ended up becoming a vault chaplain. I didn’t really get a chance at it because I became 19 as soon as I left the classroom. All hell ensued when my father left the vault for some unknown reason that seemed to piss off the overseer which led him to kill Jonas and send his guards after me.

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The overseer’s daughter, Amata, warned me about what was happening and about the guards coming for me. She said she would help me and then meet me near the vault exit but she really didn’t do anything. Near the overseer’s office, I had to stop some guards from attacking her. To get out, I had to hack the overseer’s computer and open a tunnel under his desk. When I got to the exit, I had the option to change my race. I changed it because I had a sudden realization that the world was not ready for a black wanderer. I was afraid that people would get the wrong impression. It was dark when I got out.

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This is what my character (minus clothes) looks like outside.

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When I got out, I did what any reasonable person would, I started exploring the Capital Wasteland. The game wanted me to go somewhere for a quest but I thought that could wait. I just wandered around in no direction in particular but I should have been paying attention because I was not alone. Little did I know, I was being attacked by boatflies and “vicious dogs”. After disposing of them, I found a town named Springvale that I did not remember from playing the game before.

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Springvale is full of decrepit, hollowed-out buildings (shocker) and this school that got my attention.

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The school was filled mostly with raiders and a dog which I disposed of using a baseball bat and a police baton. (fun fact) The basement has a locked room whose key you can get by killing the main raider guy. Inside that room has a hole in the ground that leads to a few paths which contain a lot of giant ants who all perished thanks to my aforementioned baseball bat and police baton. After exiting the building from the bottom, there are a few raiders outside but my guns and well-times head shots using V.A.T.S. took care of them. I looked at the time and then I realized that Penny Dreadful was on soon so I stopped playing.

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Hello, Hopefully it’s Me You’re Looking For

As you may (or maybe not) have noticed, I started this blog roughly 2 weeks ago. I did not think I would have made it this far but little did I know, I did. It hasn’t been easy coming up with new material every day. I wanted it to be mostly about movies but I haven’t had the chance to see to many movies lately because of work but it should get easier with summer coming up and school being done until the fall. Movies such as: Terminator Genesis, Magic Mike XXL, Minions, The Gallows, Self/less, Ant-man, and Trainwreck are coming up soon.

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I Need Someone to Lava (Inside Out Review)

I saw the movie “Inside Out” today and here are a few things I thought about it:

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Keep on Rocking Me Baby (Job Search Blues)

Well I’ve been lookin’ real hard
And I’m tryin’ to find a job
But it just keeps gettin’ tougher every day
But I got to do my part cause I know in my heart
I got to please my sweet baby, yeah

Steve Miller Band

(Please don’t sue me)

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Grocery Store Etiquette (Updated)

I have worked at a grocery store for nearly 7 years. I have seen and experienced many things during that time. Some customers have been good and some customers have not been so good. They act with common sense and are reasonable. Most would come in and take a shopping cart or basket, fill it with the items in which they want, ask for help if they need it, go through a checkout and then pay for their groceries. Being a cashier, I am not often privy to any of this.

Here are a few things I have noticed (and maybe some pet peeves) over this time:

1. If you take something off the shelf and then decide that you don’t want it anymore, put it back in the general area which you got it.steve1

Continue reading “Grocery Store Etiquette (Updated)”

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