Worst Movies of 2016

It’s that time of the year again. 2016 is coming to an end for a lot of us and everybody else has posted their lists of the best and worst movies of 2016 already so it’s about time that I join in and shared mine. This year, I’ve managed to break my record of 100 movies in 2015 by almost doubling it with 190 movies this year. That’s a lot of movies. Obviously, some were good and some, not so much. To match my top 20 list of the best movies of 2016, below are the top 20 worst movies of 2016:

*click the posters for links to reviews*

20. Assassin’s Creed

Video game movie adaptations have generally not fared very well and this one was no different. I was a fan of the video game series but I was disappointed to say the least. They were just so invested on building the series that they failed to pay enough attention to this entry. From its convoluted, inconsistent story, to a terrible script that not even Michael Fassbender can save, there wasn’t much here. At least it looked good and the action was kind of exciting but that wasn’t nearly enough.

19. Warcraft

Another video game movie adaptation that fared slightly worse. I wasn’t as familiar with this as I was with Assassin’s Creed but this one didn’t help either thanks to its convoluted story that only fans of the series will probably understand. In an ambitious world such as this one, a lot of CGI was involved and was well done for the most part but the boring characters and terrible acting didn’t help.

18. Mechanic: Resurrection

Jason Statham is a proven action star and this continued here where he admittedly did not have to do too much here as bad guys would seemingly just fall in his wake. The story was so boring that it almost didn’t matter or at least I gave up following it. Some may be surprised by the amount of special effects here but they were not special to say the least and were often distracting. Why would the acting be any better?

17. The Wild Life

Kudos to a Belgian animation studio for trying to compete against the big guys but this was not the best first attempt with a film about Robinson Crusoe. The animation was decent but the story was so generic and unexciting. Kids may be entertained but anyone older will be bored to death. The special thing about this film is that it features the worst voice acting I’ve ever heard.

16. Bleed for This

Miles Teller and Aaron Eckhart were okay but this movie was just so boring and there is absolutely nothing new about this generic sports biopic. Didn’t have much to say in my review and I don’t have anything more to say here.

15. Inferno

I am a big fan of Tom Hanks but I was conflicted since The Da Vinci Code made so mad and I didn’t even bother to see Angels and Demons. This entry was just so slow and convoluted that it was hard to follow. They always seemed to be running and it was hard to remember from what. The fact that it was trying too hard made it come off as pretentious which made things even more confusing.

14. Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

You would think a movie featuring the likes of Zac Effron, Anna Kendrick, Adam Devine, and Aubrey Plaza would be funny, but you thought wrong. All four were wasted here in an unfunny, mess of a movie. It just tried way too hard by being crude for the sake of being crude but it just didn’t work.

13. Norm of the North

Time for another bad animated film. Animation is supposed to get better with time but this one took a step back. There’s absolutely nothing new about this movie which seemed to be a trend with animated movies this year. This was just a ripoff of other, more popular movies. It started off a mess and fell apart as the movie went on. A lot of the voice acting was okay but that and the slapstick was cringeworthy.

12. Mother’s Day

I heard that the holiday movies were bad and now I know for sure. It haphazardly jumped between cliche, predictable, unrealistic stories and it was hard to care about any of it. Sure there’s a great cast but everyone just phones it in. If they don’t care then why should I?

11. The Young Messiah

Let’s try and tell the story of young Jesus, the part that isn’t covered in the Bible. Apparently it’s just a lot of walking with absolutely nothing else happening. There’s something else sort of going on with the Romans but it was hard to care about any of it or the other characters. The problem with kids is that they can be annoying and that was the case here.

10. When the Bough Breaks

This was almost the same plot as last year’s The Boy Next Door except with a beautiful, female surrogate instead of a mysterious, hunky guy. I like trash just as much as the next guy but this took it a little too far. This was predictable and tried way too hard to be melodramatic. The acting was okay with Jazz Sinclair as the crazy surrogate was too over the top for me.

9. Ice Age: Collision Course

Why was there ever so many of these? It just felt like everyone involved gave up a long time ago. Everything from the animation, to the script, to the voice acting was recycled from previous movies making it dated. It just doesn’t work anymore.

8. Shut In

This was a stupid, cliched thriller that just got worse the further it went. Naomi Watts was okay but it didn’t matter. Jacob Tremblay kind of was here but he didn’t really do anything. At least it looked good.

7. Risen

Another story about Jesus, who the film didn’t want to refer to as Jesus for whatever reason, that was boring and full of boring characters who didn’t inspire any excitement whatsoever. It looked decent and sounded decent but the characters were underdeveloped and Jesus was pretty lame here.

6. Masterminds

Who would have thought a movie from the director of Napoleon Dynamite would be so divisive? Some might love it but I hated it. Characters were both stupid and unlikable, which was probably the point, but it didn’t work for me. I didn’t find it funny but sad as some great comedic actors, Zach Galifianakis, Owen Wilson, Kristen Wiig, and Jason Sudeikis, were wasted here.

5. Misconduct

Al Pacino and Anthony Hopkins are two of the greatest living actors so it is baffling why they would agree to be in this movie. This was a stupid, stretched out, convoluted thriller with forced suspense and cheesy, generic, suspenseful piano music. The robotic and/or phoned in acting did not exactly help either.

4. Morgan

Things are only getting more stupid from here. This was just an incoherent and stupid mess of a movie that just got more frustrating as the film went on. The plot made absolutely no sense whatsoever and its underdeveloped and unlikable characters kept making stupid decision after stupid decision. Not even the acting could save the terrible script and terrible dialogue.

3. Collateral Beauty

Speaking of disappointments, this one was probably the biggest one this year. It’s unfortunate seeing that it boasts one of the best casts I’ve seen in a long time. The worst part about it is that the whole movie was a bait and switch, offering us something completely different than what was in the trailers. It was a forced, over-dramatic, convoluted mess featuring bad to phoned in performances.

2. The Boy

My expectations for this one were never high in the first place. I even made fun of it here. A horror movie revolving around a creepy doll did not inspire confidence and I was right. It was a stupid movie with a terrible writing with a terrible story that made no sense whatsoever and terrible performances. Pretty much everything about it was terrible.

1. God’s Not Dead 2

Just like 2014’s equally terrible pro-Christian propaganda movie God’s Not Dead, this continues what that one started but was marginally better. It featured one-dimensional characters who served its pro-Christian agenda in that Christian characters were depicted favorably while all others were evil (like how the real world works). Because the overbearing and distracting religious undertones, it was difficult to even care about the uninteresting story. Some people might like it but it was never going to be for someone like me in the first place.

Keith Noakes

The EIC of the coincidentally-named keithlovesmovies.com. A Canadian who prefers to get out of the cold and into the warmth of a movie theatre.