The Jesus Rolls – A Self Indulgent Gutterball

1998’s The Big Lebowski is an undisputed comedy classic but do we really need to go back to that world again nearly 22 years later? Whether we wanted it or not, here comes The Jesus Rolls, a spinoff of The Big Lebowski, focusing on the minor character of Jesus Quintana. Creating a film based on a minor character is certainly a risk though in this case, that risk did not pay off as the film does next to nothing over its 80+ minute running time, offering little to no likable characters, plot, or even humor along the way and making it an incredibly dull watch that will feel a lot longer than the aforementioned 80+ minute running time. Written and directed by Turturro, this film has no involvement by Joel and Ethan Cohen and it shows. Some fans of The Big Lebowski with an affinity for Quintana may find some enjoyment, however, the lack of any kind of direction whatsoever make this a frustratingly, self indulgent mess. Meanwhile, this is not a sequel to Lebowski by any means.

It may or may not have been intentional but the actual plot of The Jesus Rolls was never really clear other than it was a road trip film of sorts. After being released from prison, Jesus Quintana (Turturro) and his best friend Peter (Cannavale) just aimlessly drive around and getting into plenty of trouble along the way. Joining them for some reason was a seemingly bored hairdresser named Marie (Tautou). Other than a series of unfunny and obnoxious hijinks, the plot pretty much went nowhere and thus is was very easy to not care about a single part of it. The film’s overdependence on bad accents and gratuitous juvenile humor (that’s arguably unfavorable for women) was not only sad and unfunny, it becomes tiresome incredibly fast. Just because it can go there doesn’t mean it should, over and over and over again. Though the plot may move at a fast pace, it literally goes nowhere by hitting the same beats over and over again while not moving it forward at all, leaving audiences to surely ask themselves what the point of any of it was assuming any of it hasn’t already gotten on their nerves or if they haven’t tuned out.

Not only was the plot of The Jesus Rolls dull and derivative and the humor unfunny, the dialog was atrocious. Therefore, the acting across the board ranged from okay to painful. Perhaps the worst offender was Turturro himself as Quintana who simply insufferable to watch thanks to his painful accent. Next up was Tautou as Marie (a much different role than Amélie) whose strong French accent (Tautou is French) was played off for laughs against her ridiculous dialog but this would be another painful exercise. Cannavale was okay as Peter, more of a passenger of the other two than anything else. Meanwhile, the film would also feature multiple cameos from the likes of Christopher Walken to Susan Sarandon to Jon Hamm as a flamboyant hairdresser who were all fine despite being plot devices than actual characters.

In the end, The Jesus Rolls may disappoint audiences for not being a sequel to The Big Lebowski but in and of itself, is a painful exercise of not leaving the past in the past and just because filmmakers can do something like this, doesn’t mean they should.

still courtesy of levelFilm

If you liked this, please read our other reviews here and don’t forget to follow us on Twitter or Instagram or like us on Facebook

Keith Noakes

The EIC of the coincidentally-named keithlovesmovies.com. A Canadian who prefers to get out of the cold and into the warmth of a movie theatre.