The 355 – These Ladies Deserve Much Better

Keith NoakesFebruary 4, 202255/100n/a7 min
Starring
Jessica Chastain, Lupita Nyong'o, Diane Kruger, Penélope Cruz
Writers
Theresa Rebeck, Simon Kinberg
Director
Simon Kinberg
Rating
14A (Canada), PG-13 (United States)
Running Time
122 minutes
Release Date
January 7th, 2022
Overall Score
Rating Summary
The 355 is a generic mindless action thriller from top to bottom that thinks it's much wittier than it actually is and wastes its all star cast.

The 355 is a contradiction of a film in that it boasts an all-star female cast though was also given a January dump date that is usually associated with films for which studios have historically tried to get rid of, releasing the first weekend of the year. Normally, the combination of the two is an odd one on paper but after watching the film, it disappointingly makes sense. At the end of the day, a film with a cast such as this deserve much more than a film like this, a generic action spy thriller in every way possible that considers itself wittier than it actually is and fails to utilize their talents in a compelling way. While it did have its moments, harkening back to the mindless watches of the 1990s, it is just sad more than anything else. What truly held the film back was its lackluster direction and bad dialog, resulting in some unintentionally hilarious moments. The goal was clearly to set up a potential franchise as this was seemingly its only focus, forcing that end result without paying enough of attention to the journey to get there.

The story of The 355, which is also a silly title, is essentially irrelevant. For those who still care,  as a weaponized drive falls in the wrong hands, it is up to a hotshot CIA agent named Mason Browne (Chastain) to get it back. Little did she know, this was something she couldn’t quite do alone but she also wasn’t the only one with the same mission. Therefore the next logical step was to join forces as Browne teamed with British agent Khadijah Adiyeme  (Nyong’o), German agent Marie Schmidt (Kruger), and Colombian agent Graciela Rivera (Cruz). From there, it was all about learning to put their egos aside and work together while also keeping up with those who had more devious intentions with the drive. However, things were not always what they seemed because obviously they weren’t as the film only got increasingly ridiculous as it went on.

Nevertheless, watching the different agents and their contrasting personalities play off of each other, despite being cliches, made for some fun and exciting moments. The action, meanwhile, was fine despite suffering from the occasional editing blip. That being said, one has to suspend belief more often than not in order for it to all work and for the most part, it did. It’s a shame that they had to be bogged down by such a generic conspiracy subplot that only made the film longer than it probably had to be, clocking in at just over the 2 hour mark. The characters are so thin and dull that the emotional investment needed to care about the outcome was never there thus perhaps making it a chore to watch for some. In the end, giving these agents something more interesting and worthwhile to do would surely have afforded the film a better fate.

In spite of everything else, the best part of The 355 was the performances from its all-star female cast and their great chemistry. As mentioned, the material and direction did them a great disservice but they did their best with it. Chastain as Browne was the indisputable lead bus she and Kruger as Schmidt were absolute forces that were cut from the same cloth. Though Nyong’o and Cruz were a tier below, as Adiyeme and Rivera respectively, they were both solid supporting characters. That dynamic singlehandedly makes the film and saves it by creating enough of a fun watch to look past the flaws.

Overall, the ladies of The 355 deserve better but for their fans, this might be just enough for them.

still courtesy of Universal Pictures


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